291012 ~ ♥

Heyyy Bloggy, its time for another Tumblr blogdownnn!

Some of this stuff is from StayPozitive and some of its from KushAndWizdom, but then there are loads of little random ones too.

These speak the words of my heart, like better than i could ever say them out loud.

I see them and im like, INSTANT REBLOG!

Buttt.. I don't want them on my Tumblr cos theyre a bit TOO personal, so i save them and blog about them here :)

Although i think there is one that i reblogged too just cos it was that good!

So here they are, low and behold!:

  

This is exactly how i feel about you.

It is a pinnacle of my feelings (does that make sense? I dont think i used pinnacle right)

But just the fact that, when my friends mention your name, it stings, like i get this dropping feeling inside me.

Its funny how one name can just make you feel so destructible and vulnerable, its really weird ><"

I found this and was just like, OHMYLIFE THIS IS ME.

Simply because we made so many plans for the future, and yet, its like, in a second, you dropped them all and forget that we made those plans.

I guess those plans just werent as important to you as they were to me.

Cos when i said those things, i actually meant them.

Im not sure about you though..

But thats just the thing, i havent stopped liking you, when i shouldve really..

I think of what we had and what we could have had anyway, even without people mentioning you.

This is what my life has become.. Just missing you.

Nothing really seems real anymore, i feel like im in a world that i dont know.

Are you hurting too?

I bet youre not..

But if you are, then why did you do it?

I guess i cant say that this statement is always true, i guess some people are just douchebags, but you cared about me right?

Or at least, i thought you did.

Or maybe you did, until you hurt me.

I dunno, i just know that this statement makes sense in my head.

This one, is probably right.

We were in love, and the two times that we broke up, we remained friends, and ultimately, we ended up back together.

This time, were not friends, or at least, you dont want to be.

So i guess this tells me that, well, i actually dont know what this tells me, seeing as were not friends anymore..

Basically, youre not in love with me anymore, i get it.

  

This picture is annoying, theres a massive ass gap above and below the text T_T

But whateverrr!

Yeah, this.

I was there for you, when you needed someone the most, and when noone else seemed to be there for you half as much as i was.

When you first started uni and you felt like everything was going wrong, i was there to pick up the pieces for you.

I was there.

Never forget that.

Im posting this simply because, i miss you like crazy.

And i hope that you miss me too.

I dont want to be the only one being a stupid idiot, missing you.

Although, having said that, im pretty sure you dont miss me..

But you know, itd be good to know that you did miss me and felt stupid for making a stupid decision..

But yeah, i dunno, i really miss you.

This is how we used to be.

Itd carry on to 'I love you infinity' and so on.

Where did that all go?

Have you forgotten all of that?

Does it not mean anything that we used to be this way?

Damnnnn..

It is so, so hard not talking to you.

We used to not be able to not talk for more than a few minutes, and now? Its nearly been 5 months since we last talked.

Thats nearly half a year.

Think about it that way, 6 months, half a freaking year.

That sounds like such a long period of time.

It makes me feel the worsttt.

In a way, this has happened already.

You are out of my life, but i try my best not to picture it.

Whenever i do think about it, and remind myself that you are no longer in my life, it does make me feel sick.

I get this horrible feeling at the bottom of my tummy, like my whole body is suddenly empty.

And just knowing that youre not in my life anymore, makes me feel so sad and lonely.

I know im not lonely, i have my family, and friends, who i treasure so much, but where are you?

Where are you you assfaceeee?

You told me that youd never hurt me.

That youd never leave, you lied.

You told me nearly a year ago that youd never let me go, that you couldnt let me go because you loved me so much and that i was your everything.

Empty words, empty fucking words.

Dont say those things to me if you are gonna let me go, and if you can let me go.

Cos obviously, you can let me go, youve left, you are no longer mine.. And yet.. im still yours, which makes things millions times worse.

You were what i thought would last forever.

And at the same time, you are only a memory now.

A distant memory, that doesnt seem to fade..

It seriously sucks that youre only a memory now, i thought youd be here forever, you said youd be here always and forever.

This statements right, things do change.

This post is pretty contradictory, mainly because, i still love you.

But, also because, sometimes i wish i never loved you, because everything would be so much simpler, i wouldnt be upset that were no longer together, and i wouldnt cry about it.

I wouldnt feel so lost in my life and id just be a happier person, myself.

However.. loving you was one of the best things i ever did.

You meant the world to me, and when we were in love, everything was perfect.

I guess part of me loves our memories and part of me wishes we didnt have any at all..

I wouldnt say that i hope..

But i do think that we were meant to be together, whether you agree or will feel that in time is a different story.

Maybe itll take you years, or maybe youll never realise it at all, but i guess this stuff is all down to fate huh? :)

Which reminds me, have you watched The Last by WongFuProductions?!

Its amazingly beautiful! (As is Harry Shum >:])

This..

You used to do this whenever i did something silly.

Youd look at me and laugh and say: 'aww beee' and id be like ':(' and then youd kiss me, just to reassure me that although i was an absolute retard, you still loved me.

Funny how things pan out huh?

Over and OUTTTTTTTTTT

♥