It looks beautiful if i may say so myself =p
My baking/cooking skills are at housewife standard!
I have a feeling todays blog entry is gonna be kinda long, you better get ready to have lots told to you! :)
I am stressing out about my day tomorrow!
DAMN WORK.
Basically, i have to get up at 8..
Eat brekkie till 8:45
Start my workout at 11
Finish my workout at 12 and shower till 12:15
Hand around and do nothing for about half an hour whilst i wait for my hair to dry a little before i blowdry it ><"
Get ready at 12:45 to film my video at 1
Film my video from 1 till 2
Eat lunch from 2:30 till 3
Edit my video from 3 and hopefully finish editing and be able to start uploading it at 4:30
Which gives me 15 minutes to get changed to go to work at 4:45..
Kill me please.
Just actually kill me *sigh*
JAM PACKED DAY TOMORROW, IMMA HAVE TO STICK TIGHT TO THIS SCHEDULEE!
Oh yeah.. So me and XF have been talking again..
Weve been talking about the future/our relationship(?) etc again..
Aish, were at that stage again..
Fml.
He went and told me to love him instead of TC and to forget about TC.
LOL, why would you say something like that?
And then hes all like 'were not just friends' and hes making me ask my dad in front of him whether my dad would approve of us being together?
I dunno.. our conversations always end up really weirdly and they just go off on a tangent, and theyre always about our future house or us having sex? LMAO
Not in like an actual sex way, just like, he basically said every 1000 pounds he spends on our future house, i have to have sex with him once, so i wanted a 2.5 mil house HAHAHAHA!
And so thats like 2500 sex's a year, aka sex 7 times a day, 265 times a year..
Sorry but i am not a horny rabbit in the spring time LMAO
So i was like.. make that over 3 years pahahah!
And yeah.. Like we just always talk about weird things, i dunno..
JUST ARGH..
And when were on skype, hes just like BLEH
Oh yeah! And then after saying 'were not just friends' like 2948405 times, a few days later, when i quoted him saying 'were not just friends', he was like ' lol yeah cos were good friends'
Like.. If were good friends, then you dont have to say were not just friends.. Cos good friends are friends..
Not jus friends implies something more than friends.
Idiot T_T
I dont even know what to think when it comes to him, he confuses the fudgekins outta me.
Oh yeah, and to top it all off, he hasnt spoken to me for like over 24 hours.
Ha love life.
KL1's birthday is coming up.. Its in like 15 days, and i have no idea what to get her ><"
And i know that if i ask her, she'll be like, i dont want anything ARGH.
Shes gonna hit the big 2 0 just like me mwaahahha!
There is one thing im slightly stupidly uncomfortable about though..
So heres the thing.. The other day, i found out that KL and TC shared a bed in Southampton..
Firstly, i guess i was upset cos me and KL are supposed to besties, butttt, i didnt get an invite.
Meh whatever, i can look over that, cos im not really the type of person to get toooo upset about not getting invited to something.
Well anyways, i got over it.
But then after i got over that, i found out that theyd shared a bed..
I dunno, it just made me very uncomfortable.
It made me so uncomfortable that i cried for several hours to CT..
Thinking about it now, it was stupid, cos theyre like brother and sister, and well.. after all, its just sharing a bed right?
And especially cos i shared a bed with FH the other day when he came to visit me in bham, and like, there were no feelings whatsoever there, hes like a brother to me ^^
So yeah, looking back on it now, it was stupid to cry about that.
Obviously, i wasnt just crying about them sharing a bed, like, it was TC in general that made me cry, but to think that that triggered it *sigh*
What has my life come to?
But yeah, it did make me a very uncomfortable and upset, and i was really angry at KL for multiple reasons.
But meh whatever, i got over it, so just as well i didnt talk to her about it, cos well, its not really important is it? Haahah ^^"
But yeah, back to the presents thing..
I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT TO GET HER OMG WHAT DO I DO WITH MY LIFE?! T_T
She doesnt wear makeup, and she wouldnt want heels, and AFnpaivboabfa kill me.
But yeah, that brings me back to Summer 2011..
Wow thats a long time ago..
But yeahh, i remember that summer me and TC were broken up, and KL told me about how TC had given her this handmade present, and i got really upset..
Like, it wasnt even jealousy, like hand on my heart it wasnt, it was genuinely just upset.
And this year, stupidly, im scared hes gonna do that again..
To be honest, why am i even scared or upset about it?
Like.. its not like were together, nor are we ever gonna be again, but its just like wtffff like afpabobfaooad ><"
And i just dont know what to do or how to make these feelings go away, just go awayyyyy!
I hate myself for thinking and feeling this way, and thinking and feeling these stupid things that arent even real.
Its pretty much all made up in my head, but its just the thought that he puts into their friendship and im just like.. I was meant to have that with him.
Like, i dont even know what im thinking T_T
STUPID DAPHNE.
But yeahh, like, i know nothing would ever happen between them, thats not why im upset.
Well, if something did happen between them in the future, id pretty much disown both of them, but thats not why im upset..
Im just upset cos hes putting thoughts into their friendship and i feel like i have nothing with him.
Which is true, i do have nothing with him, because its in the past, but i just cant freaking GET OVER IT/HIM.
EURGHHHHHHHHH T_T
And its just dumb, cos i have the same kind of relationship with FH and JF, except not as extreme..
I dunno, maybe thats why..
I dunno.
And like, me and TC havent spoken for a while, like, hell never talk to me first, its always me starting conversations, and i guess even as a friend, im tired of that.
I feel like cos of the history we have between us, if i keep talking to him first, im gonna sem really keen, even if i am trying to be friendly towards him..
It just sucks that well never be able to be just friends.
Cos even when we are having normal conversations, they turn funky T_T
Like, did i tell you bloggy, about that dumbo conversation?
As in the film Dumbo?
Basically, i was like 'Dumbo's sucha cutie' and he was like 'im Dumbo!'
Like no.. Why are you saying youre what i think is cute?
And then the day FH came to bham to see me, TC and FH were facetiming, and then TC had to go to dinner with HC (his friend HILL! >;:]) and like.. he was sapping me and i was like, remember to take a picture of HC cooking for me cos guys who can cook are *insert heart for eyes face that you can find on iphone emojis* and he was like, i can cook!
And i was like.. no you can't, you didnt ever cook for me once, and he was like, fine next year il come to bham and cook for you, and i was like, haaa, whatever, when that day comes, pigs will fly, and he was like, i actually will, and i was like, looks like pigs will be flying then, and he was like, looks that way.
LIKE ARGH WHY ARE YOU SAYING THESE THINGS?!
And just.. MEHMEHMEH!
Then after he said these things, he stopped talking to me..
LOL what an utter joke.
My life is an actual joke.
Over and OUTTTTTTTTTT
♥
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