030413 ~ ♥

Bloggy..

I have had the worst day today.

Well.. It was actually a pretty good day till it reached like 8:30/9pm..

Lets start with when i woke up okai?
I woke up after having a stupid dream about TC.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Shouldve known it was a foreshadowing of what was to come later that night T_T
So anyway, after yet another night of broken sleep, there i am, waking up and thinking about him first thing.
GREAT START TO THE DAY! (Not.)
Anyways.. I decide imma soldier on, and just move on with my day!
So then daddy wakes up and is all 'Lets go to kingston'
So im like OKIE DOKIES, LEMME GET READY!
And it was all sunny and great, and even though it was cold af, i enjoy spending time with my dad, so i was like lalala, fun fun fun!
We went to the banks to sort some stuff out, and then i bought 2 pairs of new shoes, YAY :D
My feet have shrunk half a size btw bloggy..
Great..
But whatever, thats the least of my problems!
So then after that, we went to Waitrose, and bought some sandwiches for lunchies and we decided to go home after that cos i had to get home to get ready to go to AS'.

Then.. as we drive home, the traffic is soooo bad.
Now i think back to it.. There have been a lotta problems with this day T_T
Well anyways.. So were both eating whilst dads driving cos were so damn hungry and we wont have time to eat by the time we get home.
So theres us having like a proper feast, which i guess is good! :D

Then, we get home, and im all rushed to freaking get ready LMAO
And theres me trying on my new shoes seeing which ones to wear.. And lemme tell you bloggy, that is a mission and a half.
Well then anyways, im finished getting ready, and my dad takes me to the train station, and im there early.
Like a noob, sucha rookie mistake, especially onna freezing cold ass day! T_T
So anyways, train came lalala, and i meet AS on le train, and then we get to Weybridge.
Err.. We waited half a freaking hour to get on the train to Addlestone..
HALF AN HOUR.
First they were cancelled, then delayed, then whatever.
See! Another problem!
Well, anyways, the train finally came after like ten thousand years, and we got to Addlestone and i wanted a Costa..
ALAS, it was already 6pm and they were shut ><"
WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Yet another problem *sigh*

Anyways, so then we got home and everything was fine and dandyyy.
Got ready to go out etcc, and this was what i looked likee:

This is meeee, dun dun dun dun!

Check out those eyebagsss, just another sad part of my life!

I need better sleep mannn, hate my life T_T

ANYHOOOO, we arrive at the pub at 19:37.. How i remember that, dont ask me..

And me and AS are getting a drink and JWS arrives!

Not long after that, the boys start arriving, and then AB and HW arrive with their boyfriends.

Thennn, FH and JF arrive!

My boysss! ^^

So there i am super duper happy, and slightly hyper from the drink might i add.

And im like yayayyayay my boys are heree ^^

So i give them hugs lalala and then im off to order some chips cos i am so damned hungry LMAO!

Imma fatty, whatcha gonna dooo?!

So then after ordering, i walk to le toilet with AS and JWS and we hang out for a bit in there, you knowww, as girls do..

Cos toilets are the most sanitary place in the worldd..

And then we decide to leaveee and rejoin reality! ^^

And then RK is running like a madwoman to us and going 'BACK! BACK! BACK! BACK!'

I thought something had happened to her fml, she was proper like crazily yelling o.O

Then she went to me, TCs here.

My heart fucking stopped bloggy.

Like legit stopped.

I thought i was gonna be sick.

I thought i was gonna throw up.

I was like what..?

Id heard her, but its like i couldnt really take it in..

He said he wasnt gonna be here..

Why was he here?

He knew I was going to be here, so he shouldve at least texted beforehand to be like 'hey im gonna be coming tonight, just a heads up' OR SOMETHING.

ANYTHING WOULDVE BEEN GOOD FML.

So there i am, shocked as anything, and im just like fml, what do i even do with my life?

I mean, what even is life?

Imma good person, but God does not like me when it comes to me and TC ><"

I dont know why, we were a good couple, but maybe God just didnt like us together *sigh*

So then anyways, i walk up to the table, and he doesnt even say hi..

No hi, no smile, no nothing.

Doesnt even look at me.

Pretends im not there, i am non existant bloggy, im telling you..

Well either way, i sit down and eat some chips.. Although from the feeling in my tummy, i am not hungry at all.

It feels horrible in my tummy, its like its tying knots on itself.

So then him, FH, JF, and KL1 sit on another table, and i know the first table was cramped but meh, whatever.

So then im like yeahh whatever, but sometimes, hes looking at me.

I dont know what to do..

Dont look at me like you wanna say hi if youre not gonna say hi?

Im getting too old for this bloggy.. I just dont have the strength to deal with this shit anymore *cries*

Anyways, so then half way through, AS like drags him off, and i think at some point before she did that, she tried to make him speak to me but he didnt..

Typical really T_T

Well then anyways, theyre having their DMC in another part of the pub, and so im just hanging with JF and FH really, which is fine by me ^^

But then id look over and hed be looking at me..

I didnt know what to do bloggy, what would you have done?

Ottokae? ><"

Well then anyways, to cut things short, i had to leave, and i went over to hug AS after hugging everyone i was sitting with, and she told me to say bye to him.

So then i did.. Even though I felt that he shouldve been the one to speak first..

Well either way, i was like 'bye' and he went 'see you.'

No.

Dont casually say see you after youve ignored me for so long.

I can see why youd say it, just cos you know, youd say that to everyone else.

But lets be honest now, you gotta think about what you say to someone with a broken heart because of you and then you proceeded to ignore for nearly a year.

LETS BE REAL HERE, you dont just say things like that all casj.

NAHH MANNN NAHHHH.

So now i dont know whether to text you or not.

What is my life bloggy?

What actually is my life? *sigh* :'(

I need to sort this shit out.

Sometimes i feel fine, but other times, i feel like i could break down.

Back to square fucking 1 again.

Good one TC, good one.

Youve really gone and fucked me up for good.

Round of applause for you.

Now how the fuck do i unfuck myself? T_T

FUCK MY LIFE.

Whole loada fucks for you today bloggy, i apologise for my friends.

But i am well and truly, fucked.

Over and OUTTTTTTT

♥