Monday 2 May 2011

020511 ♥ x

I havent posted in ages...
I feel like i need to.
I cant believe its may already.
Ive been 18 for like, just over 4 months, how freaking weird is that?
Dunnoes, this is odd!
May '11 already.
Wow.

I havent done like, any revision.
Just allow..

Mmm, i found out the other day from my best freiend that TC read my blog every day...
Like, in the past, which means he knew exactly how I felt.
Its odd how, it doesnt make me mad, or sad, or anything, maybe cos ive decided to put the past behind me.
Like, what happened in the past is in the past and well, now, me and him are just, me and him.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Plus, were pretty perfect, im not gonna lie :)

Uhhh, today, im feeling, i dunno...?
I was in a really good mood this morning, i woke up in TC's arms, and literally, it is never an unamazing moment.
Third time hes stayed over, and yet, its like, when i wake up, and hes next to me, its like, heh ^^
And its like a completely new feeling and a completely new happiness, even though its happened before?
I dunno if that makes sense..
Im probably not making any sense.
I dunno.

Then like, later, AS isnt really texting, in fact, shes not texting at all.
Somethings up.
She says nothings up, but i know it is.
And CS may always be telling me that its bad to overthink and maybe people truly are feeling how they say they are, but, when you know someone so well, you automatically know when somethings not right.
Either way, she clearly didnt wanna say, so i was about to force her.
And how TC's like, talking, but not being like, talky talky.
But i get that sometimes, he wants his own like space :)
So its okai, im just like, cooltingsssss.
Plus, like i said, CS is right.
He always is.

And other people, argh, i just ceebs with them.
Like, i honestly, just why?
I dont understand people, ARGH.
I really just wanna get away from it all and spend time with MT, WP, ST, RO, AW, KL and AC.
It sounds really mean doesnt it?
I dunno, its not meant to!
I do love my friends, i really do.
But i miss my Sma²rk~dw so so much.
I honestly miss them so much.
I got well emotional the other day, i prpoerly like cried cos i missed them so bad.
Stupid right?
Crying cos you miss your friends, i mean, COME ON.
But honestly.
And stupid MT, just frigging liked something about HK on my video from HK
And its like, me and MT lying on the bed and WP's sitting at the end of the bed with the laptop dancing along to Digital Bounce.
And damn, i just miss them so much.
Knowing that Summer 2010 was so so good.
Like, i wanna go back to HK, me, MT and WP having sleepovers like every single frigging day, seeing each other, every day.
It was so good, literally the best.
I dont think ive spent so much time with the same people everyday for so long.
But im not gonna lie, i loved every single day.
Just seeing those videos, i dont think my friends will ever know just how much they mean to me.
They make me laugh, they make me cry (with laughter), theyre here for me.
Take me back please :(
Rarrrrrrrrrrr, i just cant.
Im so freaking emotional.
I miss them so much.
I wanna cry.
I feel really alone at this point, at this moment, i dont know why.
Its like i dont have anyone.
And i know i do, because i have the most amazing boyfriend ever, the best friends, and an amazing daddy.
But i just wanna sit with my Sma²rk~dw and chat, catch up, make noise, i dunno.
Do what we do best, which is just be ourselves and laugh shit loads.
I need them so badly :'(
I miss you.

Over and OUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT


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